empatheias | open-ish

Entry tags:

open-ish

Who: Riku and others
Where: Around Verens
When: Middle of the month
Format: [ like this ]
open-ish
Summary: Just a gloomy gus needing some fresh air. Closed prompts will be top-leveled, open prompts free to anyone.

( TREE OF MEMORIES )
[ This place isn't anywhere that Riku has been before, though he's heard of it, somewhat. It's basically a tree that holds petals of memories from all those who come near it... or who inhabit the island... one of the two? Maybe both? Regardless, he's here, feeling the need to just get out and away from everything and everyone and he's made sure to keep himself relatively bundled up lest he end up sick again.

When a breeze gently drifts by, crisp and cool and allowing strands of silver to blow around his face, Riku catches sight of a drifting petal that falls from the tree and, perhaps without even realizing so, he holds his hand out and allows the petal to land in his palm.

The memory that it contains is one that seems almost ironic considering current circumstances of people within his life. It's distorted, perhaps a bit scratchy in a way, but it shows a sleeping Sora encased in what looks like a bubble. Standing outside that bubble and staring to the sleeping Sora is Riku, dressed in black and donning the blindfold much as he still does within this world. Off to the side, Naminé is there, sitting at a long table and seemingly sketching in a book, though she doesn't seem to address Riku within the memory. Gently, he reaches out with a gloved hand and presses it to the front of the bubble and the strongest emotion that can be felt even with watching this memory unfold... is grief.

It figures this memory would show itself now of all times and, to be honest, he almost finds it funny, as if a silent punishment personally dished out for him. Well-played, Tree of Memories.

Riku, of course, tries to brush off the memory and any feelings that might be attached to it. Though one can't exactly deny that the air around him seems a lot more chillier than anywhere else near the tree. ]

( IT'S RAINING, IT'S POURING )
[ What had started out as something that should have taken maybe ten minutes at most has turned into a good thirty minutes standing outside the tea shop in the pouring rain.

The weather hasn't been the greatest as of late and yet Riku thought he could pick up this box of tea for Cloud and be out of here before it started to come down like it is now. How wrong he apparently was. Thankfully, he's standing under the awning of the shop, arms crossed, blindfold on, finger tapping against the box of tea he holds. The rain doesn't seem to be letting up anytime soon and the shop has closed, leaving Riku out here in the damp without an umbrella. He sighs, head lolling to the side as he shifts his weight to one leg, contemplating the thought of just sucking it up and walking back to Cloud's in this weather. ]

It's never going to stop...

[ Maybe you're stuck under here with him. Maybe you're passing by. Maybe you have an umbrella to lend to him. Or maybe you're out enjoying the rain. Whatever the case, Riku's not looking too happy... and the frost that's come to coat the tips of his shoes is a little bit of a hint to that. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ At the suggestion to sit, Riku doesn't even bother to object and silently complies with a bit of stumbling along the way down. He comes to rest his back against the brick wall of the nearest building, breaths slow and steady with his head lolled to the side. It's... exhausting, the darkness. To have it seep out is draining enough but to reel it back in and contain it, control it, tame it... it's also exhausting, never mind having to experience it and all the emotions that come with it.

Swallowing thickly, he pulls his knees up close to his chest, an arm draped over them while the other lays beside him and his head falls to press his forehead against his forearm. He's drained... so very drained. Physically and emotionally. ]

[ After Riku sits, Arden sighs with relief. Then he turns around and sits behind Riku - back to back. He figures it's a way he can still give more dunamis effects to Riku if he needs it. Sure, he can't give Riku the equivalent of a night's rest, but he can try to keep fanning that small flame of Light until Riku's closer to his natural balance again - not 50/50 by a long shot, but what's been normal for him in the time that Arden's been around him this last time.

And he stays like that, with his back straighter so that their lower backs touch with Riku leaning over still. He quietly meditates, radiating a sound like wind-chimes that's actually the sound of Zenyatta's orbs floating around in the air. It's what he associates with peace of mind. So even if it doesn't help Riku, it focuses Arden dunamis, and he's hoping he can stay serving as that anchor until Riku's balance returns.

But no words... he doubts there are words that can describe how the two of them are feeling as their connection just gets more and more complicated the more similar they reveal themselves to be. ]

[ Much like Arden, Riku sits there in silence but also in exhaustion. He can still hear the words that the other offered him moments before his darkness threatened to take control of the situation and while they hold truth to them, he can't bring himself to really acknowledge them in the moment, fearing that it might stir more emotions deep within and, well, they'd be right back at square one all over again.

But to sit here with Arden... with his replica who he had once defeated, even called a fake... it's strange and not anything that he thought he would experience like this. The fact that Arden even stayed with him like this, offered him help (though he feels for Sora's sake and not so much his own) and tried to reason with him... it's strange and he's not all too sure what to make of it just yet. So, that's why there's silence between them.

At least, until Riku lifts his head a bit. ]

Arden.

[ He says the name softly. ]

Give me your hand.

[ The hand that remains beside him on the ground, palm facing up. ]

[ Riku can almost certainly feel Arden's head snap up just a little more than it was after Arden's sure he heard that correctly.

Had he even told Riku that out loud? They'd only spoken three times, including this one, and had he actually... had he said how frustrating it was that Riku didn't call him anything at all? Just 'you' and other pronouns.

Because that kind of acknowledgement, that was one of the things missing to him. The kind of thing Riku didn't want to talk about because it only provided him peace of mind and did nothing for Riku, or so the excuse had gone.

But yeah... that guy, The Real Thing, he'd used Arden's chosen name for the first time. ]

[ He looks the wrong way first, then to the side of Riku's body with his hand clearly facing up - a much clearer signal.

Once upon a time this would have scared him, like it was some trap. Once upon a time he would balked at quiet moments being useful tools to heal deeply personal wounds.

And yet here he is, reaching across the vast expanse that they carved out to separate themselves from one another, and places his own hand against Riku's, palm-to-palm. He doesn't close it though, unsure of Riku's intentions, just... trying to have faith that this can mean something good - for both of their sake's. ]

[ To be honest, he's not even so sure that Arden will comply with his request much as he had done with the sitting down part. But, when he does? Well, he has to admit that he's a little surprised.

To feel the other's palm against his own... it's familiar in a strange sort of way and yet it's different at the same time, regardless of what either of them might think or feel. Carefully, he comes to curl his hand around Arden's, fingers resting against the back of the other's hand. It's gentle and not at all firm... but at the same time, it's somehow... perhaps not desperate but... hopeful. ]

Why Arden?

[ He asks then, his voice still soft. ]

I mean, it's honestly better than anything Sora might have picked...

[ 'One day,' he thinks, 'One day moments like this won't just be a calm after a storm.'

Because it's the kind of question he absolutely wouldn't have expected Riku to ask - the kind of thing he didn't think Riku cared about. ]

... I asked him to pick one out for me, actually. He refused.

[ He smiles at the memory, perhaps a bit wider and more willing to be open because they aren't facing one another, almost as if to make up for that fact. He doesn't try to close his own hand around Riku's since he's the one recovering and there's the ground right under his hand, but Arden lets the contact remain - if it convinces Riku of something about Arden, then so be it. ]

So Arden is because... Ardent, the real meaning, and Garden. The shared letters of both words.

[ So minus the G of Garden and the T off the end of Ardent, the leftover was 'Arden' in both cases.

There was more, how he literally ran through a list of names in a book and pulled out a few different kinds of names - like all ones relating to nature due to his affection for Snow White and being unsatisfied with all of them, so the G-Arden-T version was the closest he could get. But ultimately it still came down to Garden + Ardent. ]

Edited 2018-03-22 03:58 (UTC)

[ As Arden explains, Riku listens with a gentle silence. This moment here between them... when everything had been so chaotic and emotional mere minutes ago to now be calm and still... perhaps it's a different sort of whiplash all on its own and yet, it doesn't feel forced or rushed or even wrong. It simply... is.

His hand still holds to Arden's, Riku having come to press his cheek against his arm draped across his knees again and, despite wearing the blindfold, he allows his eyes to fall shut once more, exhaustion clinging tight to him still; the fact that he's been having nightmares which have made it difficult for him to sleep haven't helped any. ]

It suits you.

[ A gentle sort of approval given from the very one who wears the same face as him, Riku sighs softly, coming to find his breaths not being as heavy anymore as they had been before in all that emotional chaos. ]

I don't know if I can make it back.

[ He mutters that softly, not bothering to life his head or even let go of Arden's hand. ]

[ He wouldn't have changed his name even if Riku had tried to say it didn't suit him, but to get that kind of reaction was still... something. It settled a bit of anxiety in Arden, but more than anything he hoped it moved Riku in a direction that made it easier for them to communicate - acknowledging him as a person with a real name Riku could use. ]

... Thanks.

[ Even to Sora or Snow White or Zenyatta or Minnie, he struggled with saying that. But he meant it. His voice was quiet saying that, so he chokes a little trying to switch topics, but he gets there. ]

I- Hm, shouldn't take you through a Corridor like this either... How far is your apartment?

[ Or wherever he's staying that's not the house. ]

[ No, going through a dark corridor might be a little... much for Riku at the moment and so he agrees with Arden's suggestion to not take that route. However, when asked how far is apartment is he... laughs a little. Well, it's more like a soft breath of amusement muffled against his arm but, it's along the same lines, right? ]

Don't know since I don't have one.

[ Lifting his head, he sighs, allowing it to gently knock back against Arden's. ]

I don't mind going back with you.

[ Back to where Arden lives... where he himself apparently has a room. ]

[ Arden's head turns and he starts to make a 'whaaa?' sort of expression while holding down the urge to say something along the lines of "I need to yell at you more often" and ends up with a wordless "wow" sort of thing going on as he shakes his head. ]

Ah... Okay then.

[ But could he make a joke about soup... No, no, no he's trying not to push it. He slightly raises the hand Riku's holding, though. ]

You need a hand, or you need a shoulder?

[ Maybe that was what Riku was going for, a hint that he'd need help walking back. ]

[ Still clutching that hand that he holds a little tighter now, Riku begins to shift some from his spot on the ground. ]

A hand... might be nice.

[ And, of course, he pushes himself up to get to his feet and finds that gravity seems to be against him in the moment, wobbling some before he reaches out with his other hand to steady himself against the wall; his lack of sleep on top of this little emotional outburst isn't exactly making any of this easier on an exhausted body. ]

That's what I thought.

[ He wasn't positive Riku would say it, but he was sure Riku should say it so that Arden didn't have to keep forcibly helping him when he was obviously not in peak physical condition. ]

I'm shorter anyway, you might as well use my shoulder if we're going to walk together.

[ There, a joke at his own expense as he stands up and stands nearby Riku, waiting for him to signal he's ready to walk and not still regaining his balance. ]

Edited 2018-03-23 00:12 (UTC)

[ At least there isn't any ice forming at the tips of his boots anymore, let alone chilled air and puffs of breath showing how distressed he currently is. No, it's more exhaustion now than anything else, even if he can still feel that ice deep within his chest.

Rather than say anything regarding the height difference, Riku leans against Arden before gently allowing his hand to slip out of the other's... and promptly comes to grasp at his shoulder when he feels his legs wanting to stumble forward. Yeah, this is going to be a bit of a challenge getting back. ]

Why do you like to cook so much?

[ Perhaps it seems random to ask, but it gives Riku a distraction from the fact that his body is tired so that he can force himself to keep going and not allow his thoughts to linger on the can't or even won't part of his mind. ]

[ If Riku had asked that question out of the blue while he wasn't exhausted and coming down from a massively overwhelming Darkness-related experience, Arden would have really snapped back at him. After how much progress he'd thought they made, and for Riku to ask him that... ]

... I thought I told you that already.

[ He tries to keep his voice simply to confusion. Maybe Riku thought before that Arden only explained why he started cooking, not why he kept going with it. That would be a subtle distinction he could understand. As it is he focuses his eyes forward and keeps pace with what Riku's steps appear to be - which are hardly speedy, but he's not standing still either. ]

[ Well, here he is about to admit something that... well, perhaps it's of no real surprise considering their first few encounters with one another here. ]

I wasn't really listening before.

[ He falls silent for a moment. ]

I'm sorry.

[ And there it is, there's the guilt creeping itself back in on him as they (slowly) go. He doesn't even try to make any excuses other than simply stating the truth. Sure, he could try and argue that there had been too much animosity coursing through him regarding Arden in the moment but... does it change the fact that he hadn't been listening? That he had more or less thrown away whatever words Arden had offered him back then? No, it doesn't and while Arden may feel slighted for that, perhaps it's better for Riku to simply tell him the truth...

...and apologize for it. ]

[ Yeah of course he's frustrated. Not that he doesn't remember the story with Snow White perfectly well and all of the good things that came after it. Not that those aren't good memories he enjoys thinking about. It's Riku having disregarded him trying to explain his efforts to become 'Arden' in ways that weren't tied to being 'Riku.' And that had become a really important time in his relatively short life, so hearing that he hadn't really listened, that did sting. Of course it did.

But he doesn't stop walking. He just seethes out his mouth for one long breath while keeping pace. That's what he has to do. ]

Apology accepted.

[ That's hardly something he finds easy either, so he can hear that slow, measured kind of sincerity that came from someone not saying the words often or glibly. ]

I guess it's also possible I didn't actually say it was about cooking and baking when I mentioned it before - when I talked about trying new things, having no other skills aside from fighting, and not giving up when I was really bad at those new things.

Anyway it was a pretty random start. I told someone I had no skills or hobbies of my own and they suggested baking and cooking, as a way to connect with people in a way completely unlike fighting. Snow White offered to teach me and I was terrible at it for months. I threw a lot of burnt and bland things in the trash.

[ He raises his other hand opposite Riku to his neck. Here the positive emotions creep back in, a bit of pride even - because he's not saying it, but this was all Sora and Snow White encouraging him through this period. ]

The couple of times I made anything edible were for other people's parties. And... they liked it.

[ Riku feels... tired as they go. But, despite the exhaustion, he listens to what Arden says- really listens this time, even if his eyes want nothing more than to shut themselves behind that blindfold of his. ]

Not going to tell me fashion is a work-in-progress skill of yours, are you? I've seen that apron.

[ The Sweetie Pies?? apron he initially first met Arden wearing in the kitchen. Which... Riku is clearly trying to offer a lighthearted joke with that remark, feeling that perhaps the moment could use it what with how emotionally draining everything else had been moments ago.

Just look at him now having to lean against Arden as they go. ]

[ He gives Riku a look for that remark. ]

No I'm just as much a disaster in that department as you are and not trying to improve it either.

[ There, some shade back. ]

Snow White designed the apron and she runs the bakery. I'm the manager, part-time chef, and stocker.

[ ~~Listen Arden COOL KIDS WEAR BLINDFOLDS!!~~

There's silence that falls over them when Arden mentions the Princess of Heart and he comes to stare ahead as they go. He remembers Sora mentioning how Arden made pies or something... again, he hadn't really been listening much to how Arden was different here and instead so focused on the fact that he was here to begin with. ]

Can't say I've ever been there.

[ And he's not so sure he ever will go there. ]

[ Arden shrugs at that. ]

I'm not expecting you to swing by.

[ Riku of all people enjoying a bakery isn't something he'd expect, nor seeking out Arden's own workplace in order to keep up the space between them aside from moments like this. ]

More in case you ever need to find me and I'm not at the house, that's a good second place to look. After baking came cooking, and then some other things like ice cream.

[ He's purposefully vague here because the baking opportunities were for Sora and the ice-cream was with Sora's help for Roxas's benefit. ]

So now I make dinner most every night and snacks whenever anyone asks for it. It's hard not to enjoy something when other people appreciate it so much. Plus as for earning money... frankly it pays better over time than running after Task Board stuff, which was mostly more of me fighting anyway. And I was trying to avoid that early on.

[ Out of a pure contrarian drive to not be like Riku. ]

[ While perhaps he may not come to outright say just yet, Riku silently mulls over the fact that Arden has, quite honestly, made a life and forged a new identity for himself within this world. For as distraught and even annoyed as he had been to find that his replica was here (and even friends with Sora), he hadn't even entertained the idea of how his own arrival here must have made Arden feel... maybe as though everything he had worked hard to create for himself would all be for nothing, come to mean nothing, making him feel as though he were nothing.

Maybe that's how he would feel... maybe it's how he did... Riku isn't so sure and can only guess because that's how he would feel were the shoe on the other foot.

However, there's something that still lingers on his mind, something that he's been chewing his lower lip over until he finally decides to just say it. ]

You knew, didn't you?

[ Softly, he comes to pause in his words, looking to the ground as they go. ]

About Sora.

[ Sora and... his someone else. ]

[ Despite his best efforts at getting better at reading people, six words really didn't help him out in the least. It was only because they were several minutes into an extended conversation that he could pin down what 'About Sora' could possibly mean. He didn't think that Riku was accusing him of having a strong enough bond to know the instant Sora turned to crystal - he didn't - and he was sure that nothing in previous several sentences had given away that he'd made a ton of those early snacks for Sora. Specifically for him, as someone he'd... had a lot of complicated feelings about.

So yeah that really only left one topic they'd covered. ]

Yeah, I knew.

[ Three months now. ]

[ He doesn't... he can't be frustrated with Arden for that what with his only having been here for almost two months now while both Arden and Sora have been here for much much longer. It's more of his wanting to know for himself, given how "alike" they supposedly are as Arden seemed to claim earlier even if it had been in annoyance. It simply has Riku wondering if Arden felt the same sort of emotions that Riku felt upon learning such a thing... if he could understand that sort of... ache. ]

Can you take me to my room?

[ The one that's his at least what with living in the house with the others... even if he's not around there much as of late... which Arden may finally understand why. ]

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